


The End Of The World As We Know It

by debirlfan



Category: Allstate Insurance "Mayhem" Commercials, Progressive Insurance "Flo" Commercials
Genre: Apocalypse, F/M, Zombies?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-23
Updated: 2019-10-23
Packaged: 2020-12-28 21:55:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 711
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21143834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/debirlfan/pseuds/debirlfan
Summary: Jamie opens up something a lot worse than a can of worms. Flo and Mayhem have to cope.





	The End Of The World As We Know It

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Missy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Missy/gifts).

“This is all your fault.”

“_My_ fault?” Mayhem turned away from the tiny, reinforced and barred window he'd been peering through. Flo was sitting on the floor, her back against the wall, her hair disheveled, her apron dirty and torn. It was only her obvious distress that kept him from really lighting into her. “How in hell do you figure this is _my_ fault?” He took another quick look out the window before sinking down to sit beside her. “I may not be the sharpest crayon in the box, but unlike your little buddy, I know enough not to open a box with bright red 'bio-hazard' warnings all over it.”

Flo rolled her eyes. “Jamie is not my buddy. At best he's my minion. Or at least he was. And you know why he opened the box. He thought it was some new video game that's supposedly due out any day now.”

Mayhem snorted. “Yeah. I think the game is going to be on hold. Indefinitely.”

It had been pure, random chance that both the Allstate and Progressive reps had had appointments at the lab at the same time that morning. Well, actually, Mayhem's appointment was fifteen minutes earlier, but as luck would have it, he was running late. The receptionist had gone to announce their presence, and Jamie had spotted the box on her desk. Despite the two senior reps both telling him to leave it alone, Jamie had tried to get a peek at the contents.

When the purple, smoking liquid started to pour from the box, Mayhem had instinctively grabbed Flo's arm and started pulling her toward the door. The scream coming from behind them told him it was the right call. Mayhem had looked back, long enough to see that Jamie was turning into...something. Something that definitely wasn't human, and that had started to shamble in their direction, arms out-stretched and teeth bared.

When your reputation as a trouble magnet is such that everyone knows you as Mayhem, you plan ahead. Among other things, that plan included a well-stocked safe room. He wasn't sure why he had brought Flo with him rather than leaving her behind, especially when she had done nothing but argue and complain about his driving as he had raced across town, but he found that he was glad that he had. Flo might not be the best company, but he couldn't imagine being all alone.

“What do we do now?” she asked, her question nearly echoing his own thoughts.

“Wait.” There was little else they could do. The power had gone out two hours earlier. Shortly thereafter, his battery operated emergency radio had fallen silent, the increasingly frantic news reports giving way to static.

Mayhem reached for the radio, pulling it to him and slowly twisting the dial and watching the needle move from one end to the other. There was still nothing. He set the radio down. “Maybe it's broke,” he offered, despite knowing that it wasn't. “Or maybe the government has shut down the airwaves to prevent panic.”

“If they did it to prevent panic, it's not working.” Her hands were visibly shaking, and her makeup was smudged where she'd been crying.

“Flo, we're safe here. We've got enough food and water for at least two weeks, more if we ration it. By then, this will all have been contained and cleaned up.” He wasn't so sure about the last, but he wasn't going to tell her that.

“What if it isn't? What if we're the only ones who....?”

“These days a lot of people have safe rooms. Hell, some of the preppers I've met have entire bunkers.” Mayhem knew people considered him a bit of a cad, and if he could use that to take her mind off what was going on outside, he would. He plastered a fake grin across his face. “Worst case scenario, it falls to the two of us to repopulate the Earth.”

She snorted at that, as he had hoped she would. “You and me, repopulating the planet?”

“Sure. Why not?” He let his grin change to a leer. He was probably going to get slapped, but if it distracted her, he could live with that. “So,” he began, “Do you want to practice?”


End file.
